Friday, September 30, 2005
You Gotta Read This
After forcing the vehicle to the side of the road, deputies pulled Hollimon out of the cab when he refused to come out voluntarily.
"He told us he was trying to get out of the state because the judge told him to," Venable said, though he was unable to comment on the significance of this statement. Officers noticed that Hollimon had made an attempt to disguise himself, wearing a stethoscope around his neck, a pager on his waist, and carrying two latex gloves in his back pocket. According to Venable, the disguise was less than convincing.
"I don't think anyone would have mistaken him for a doctor," Venable said.
Hollimon's appearance, however, was less strange than the presence of another passenger in rear of the ambulance: a dead deer, fully stretched out, strapped to a gurney inside.
"Read More"
"And More"
I'm just betting that the judge told him "Now on your way out of town boy, I want you to steal an ambulance and pick up a deer. Make it a dead deer boy, cuz' that way you can make jerky. You never know when your gonna want jerky boy."
No Paint By Numbers For Me
Never to be one who isn't open to culture, I took a shot at "SurrealPainter" and created a, I don't know what.
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Unlikely What?
After hearing what's revealed in this book maybe they should have titled it "Ice Angel". It seems as if my friends, family and I are the only ones not getting jacked up on some kind of drug these days. Now granted I have not read this book yet, and I'm sure there is a whole lot more to it than the fact that Ashley managed to keep a little "ice" around for any alleged kidnappers that may drop by. I guess that I am just jaded, yeah, that's what I am jaded.
Hats off to Ashley if she's turning here life around, but like "The Wife" always says "bad company corrupts good character".
The local news station apparently didn't harness enough media horsepower to land an interview with Miss Ashley but they were granted an interview with her boyfriend/ex-boyfriend/whatever. This cat was full of all kind of useful information. After watching this interview and hearing of Ashley's plight "H" looked perplexed. "Hey bud what's wrong?" I asked. "Nothing really it's just that girl makes me want to say the "E" word" he replied. I quickly ran down all the "bad" words that I knew which begin with an E, nothing there, then I ran down all the bad words that I may have spoke that begin with an E, nothing there either. OK, little man fire away, what's the "E" word?
IDIOT!
That's my boy a combination of street smarts and a public school education.
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Saturday, September 24, 2005
One Of These Things Is Not Like The Other
The fall soccer league is back up and rolling. "H" and his team have won all four games this season. "Goose" managed to bring the only umbrella that didn't match.
In case you were wondering the "G.S.M.A" is back in full swing as well.
OPD, Yeah You Know Me
"Goose" has confided in myself and "The Wife" that she has a problem.
It's OPD - obsessive Purse Disorder. This girl buys more purses than anyone I have ever known. Here is the kicker, she's always broke and has nothing to put in the purses.
Make it idiot-proof, and someone will make a better idiot
Apparently the Japanese love vending machines "LINK"
My favorite is the catch your own lobster game. Next time you visit "Red Lobster" bring a roll of quarters so you can catch your own meal. This will be a huge hit right up to the point of "PETA" (sorry wrong link) finding out about it.
Friday, September 23, 2005
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet its hard to pronounce
The kids are getting a 4 day weekend. Our governor Sonny Perdue (Not the chicken dude) has asked the Georgia schools to shut down this coming Monday & Tuesday. This action will help save close to 500,000 gallons of diesel fuel "LINK". Gov. Perdue has suggested taking these(2) days from our "Snow Days" funds, not a bad suggestion since we really don't get a lot of snow here.
The governor's rash request has caused a two fold problem.
The first fold was felt immediately as folks lined up at the gas pumps fearing a gas shortage.
The second fold will kick into gear next February, this fold is much more tragic, more detrimental than running out of fuel. Next February this state will be filled with whining 11 & 12 year olds that will be forced to drag themselves to school on what was to have been the first of their non-used "Snow Days".
These little midgets will forget that they had September 26 & 27 off and resort to fit throwing and tantrums.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To kick Governor Perdue in the shin.
Thanks for the lov Gov....
Thursday, September 22, 2005
Frick's World Travel Tip #15
Don't bother searching for the first 14 tips there aren't any, this is the first official tip, but #15 gives a better appearance than #1.
We have had a few un-official tips in the "past" but again this one is official.
TIP #15
When returning your rental if you plan to leave the keys in the ignition while waiting for rental lot lizard to tally up your bill ROLL DOWN THE CARS WINDOW!
The poor guy behind me at Hertz this evening did not follow this advice, too bad. He hops out of the car, the Hertz guy hops in writes down the odometer, hits the door lock button, forgets to remove the keys and slams the car door. Forgets to remove the keys, "Son-Of-A-Nutcracker, my luggage is still in the trunk and scattered across the back seat" is all I could hear this poor chap scream.
As I hopped the bus to the terminal I thought "Man, this guy sure could have used Travel Tip #15"
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Any Landing You Can Walk Away From Is A Good One
"Amazing landing" but what's more amazing is that we now have the technology to watch the whole thing unfold in real time on the internet.
It's all about content and how fast and how many different ways can you serve it up to me.
JetBlue has TV's mounted in the head rests of the seats and I believe they feed FOX, CNN or MSNBC to these TV's. I wonder if the passengers were watching themselves on these sets, listening to the news anchors talking about how flammable jet fuel is and how the runway is lined with 110 firefighters?
You Just Don't Fit In
Could this be Martha's answer to "The Donald's" "Your Fired" catch phrase?
I admit it, I watched. I had too, I love this kind of crap TV.
It's one thing to watch "The Donald's" version where we see the battle of the sexes, but it's another to watch "Martha's" version where half of the guys are acting like girls and then some of the girls are acting like hardened executives from the "Gold ole' Boys Club".
My favorite bit was when "Jim" who may be all of 21 uttered this great bit of wisdom right off of page 15 of any entry level business book, "It's eat or be eaten, it's kill or be killed". Hey Jim, I've got ties older than you, they may be out of style, but they do have more business experience than you do.
Martha gathered the final 3 in the board room with her version of a George and a Carolyn. It was 1 girl, 2 guys and ended up in a verbal cat fight. They were so busy throwing each other under the bus that all I could hear was peoples skulls bouncing off of the transmission.
While I am sharing with everyone tonight here is another little bit that really pisses me off. People that have been out of the industry for a year or so doing something completely different, that insist on telling me what my industry is like, how things need to be marketed designed etc..... No, you don't know how things are, your not doing this any more and you haven't for the last year, you left, this is not your ball field any more. If you want to play put on the cleats and come back onto the field we'll let you. A year or two in the business world is a long time, you've been gone things change, trends change not saying that your dumb, just removed.
Apologize for the rough tone it's just been a long week and it's only Wednesday.
Monday, September 19, 2005
How Is Your Wife Dealing With Pain
Was the subject line of an e-mail awaiting me this morning. I didn't know if my corporate coach was trying to tell me something or not, so I opened the e-mail. What do I get but a link to my own on-line pharmacy, cool.
Now what I can't tell is if these pills are going to cure my wife's pain or cause my wife pain.
As I always say better living through chemistry.......
Saturday, September 17, 2005
Homecoming Has Begun
The smell of hair spray and fried follicles filled the air this afternoon as we prepared for the evening
She Doesn't Sweat Much For A Fat Cat
A recent shot of "Boo Kitty" her weight is ever increasing, if only my 401k would get as fat at the same rate. "Boo Kitty" is now so fat that she must lean against a wall in order to prop herself up. Her tongue is so heavy and bloated that it just falls out of her mouth because her jaw muscles lack the strength to keep it in her mouth.
Why Homeowner Associations Exist
"H" had soccer pictures this morning 8:00am to be exact this morning.
"H" has played soccer 5 or 6 years, we have truly lost count. At pictures this morning there was all the 4 and 5 year olds lining up for pictures, their parents filling out the picture order forms. We could over hear these "Virgin Soccer Parents" I need 2 pennants, 10 trading cards pictures, 7 magnet pictures, 2 team pictures and 1 8X10 individual shot for over the fireplace. After so many seasons "The Wife" and I usually look at the order form and zero in on what ever is the cheapest package available and order that one.
OK, back to the subject at hand. Frick's World changed geographic locations a few years ago because, we needed more space and the kids needed better schools. After soccer pictures we decided to cruise through the old stomping grounds and see what has transpired since we packed up. As we cruise up to the original Frick's World manor what do we spy but a purple house, a "Fricking Purple As Barney's Belly Button House". I know what I had to do, I turn the car around and force "The Wife" to hang out the window and snap off a picture or two.
Beautiful, the only 2 things you can see from the space station is The Great Wall Of China and this purple house.
Just a simple word of advice to homeowners every where. If you are planning to paint your house do your neighbors a favor walk out to the end of your driveway, look up and down your street. Do you see any purple, lime green, baby blue or pink houses in your neighborhood? No you don't, then don't paint your house any of those colors. Look we really don't care that you are an individual or if you want to express yourself, if that was truly the case you would be living on the side of a mountain with a billy goat for a neighbor.
Just remember you are unique, just like everyone else......
Friday Night Lights
Brookwood won 60 - 0. "Would the lady who lost her 11 kids please retrieve them because the Broncos are beating them up" was heard over the stadiums PA system.
The Brookwood Band marked the field for the introduction of the homecoming court. One of the girls running for homecoming queen listed her hobbies as fishing and hunting, get in there girl.
The "Band Nerd" support team was everywhere.
High school football games are still a place for students to go and be seen. I asked "Goose" what the final score of the game was, he reply "There was a game?"
I must say that high school students are much better looking now than when I was in school.
Tonight is the homecoming dance and I imagine that Frick's World will be whipped up into a frenzy by late afternoon.
Thursday, September 15, 2005
I've Been Waiting For This
Gillette has gone and done it now "LINK". A 5 bladed razor, just what I need. Now I have 5 opportunities to give myself a tracheotomy at the crack of dawn. Won't be long before we see 6 blades.
Check out the extreme shaving "LINK"
I'm Not That Stupid
I picked up this cool caribiner/flashlight key chain last week.
Immediately I hung it on my computer bag, this way people think I'm an outdoor guru or something.
No one at work has ever asked me for a flashlight, much less a weak single "AAA" battery flashlight, but now I'm ready if someone really needs one.
I was looking at my newest little gadget this afternoon and I noticed that stamped in the side is this warning "Not For Climbing".
This could only mean one thing, and that is, somewhere some dumb-ass actually used this $3.00 piece of stamped aluminum as their one and only safety link.
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
What's Going To Happen To All My Sky Miles
"Delta what are you doing?"
It's kind of like having someone work for you doing a relatively simple job. You pay this person mad cash, serious mad cash more money than any anyone else doing the same simple job in the whole world. Then one day you find out this person is broke, real bankruptcy type broke. How can that be...................
Every and I mean every flight that I am on is full and in some cases over-booked. Hell, you guys are trying to buy the seats back from us.
Where is your cash going? I know the price of Jet Fuel is up but so is the cost I'm paying you for a round trip ticket. You may have recently sold one of your regional units and are downsizing your Cincinnati hub (damn those chili boys), will it be enough? Who knows maybe the market is ripe for someone to swoop in, you never know....
My Latest Rant
Below are some shots from this weeks choice.
The walls are completely trashed and for some reason I have brown electrical sockets.
Giant crack in the sink. Do you have any idea how hard is to crack a sink and not actually break it, I didn't think so....
and oh yeah the sink is becoming unattached from the counter
The ceiling paint is flaking, nice.....
The bathtub looks like something from my bachelor days.
This hotel is part of a major chain located in a major city, unbelievable
Monday, September 12, 2005
Sunday, September 11, 2005
The Eagle Has Landed
Mission completed. Homecoming shoes, no wait edit, the "Perfect Homecoming Shoes" were acquired this morning. After only 2 shopping trips theses babies were purchased today. From what I am being told we now have everything required for "Goose" to attend homecoming. I personally am doubting the validity of the previous sentence, but you never know...
If You Got Them Share Them
If you are ever lucky enough to find "Liquorice Altoids" buy a couple of tins, one for yourself and one to pass along. If you like liquorice you'll like these, if you hate liquorice these are going to suck
Homecoming Countdown
Homecoming Countdown is madly underway. We spent last evening at the mall on a search and destroy mission in search of black shoes and accessories. We came up empty on the shoe mission. I entered the suggestion of "Just buy white shoes and then take a black sharpie marker to them" this suggestion was met with moans and groans, but at least they did feed me.
They are fussing with hair-styles this morning. I figure that with enough clips, pins and hair spray you can can make hair do just about anything (see picture above). Now with my bald melon being what it is they were once again not very receptive to my suggestion. It's a tough crowd......
Saturday, September 10, 2005
Reading & Writing
"Goose" has already had several new students at her school from NOLA. Some of these students might actually have a shot at a quality education "LINK".
Thursday, September 08, 2005
Insensitive Picture Of The Week
I saw this Photoshoped picture on "BoingBoing". Not making a political stand on one side or the other, I'm Switzerland, remember. It's funny, insensitive yes, but funny....
Happy Anniversary To Us
"The Wife" and I celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary this week. Almost married half of my life, sounds like a good title for a book. We have never made a big deal of our anniversary. It seems every year we plan to go out, something simple, dinner movie home by 10:00pm, and it seems every year something comes up or we are just to tired.
We did exchange gifts, I gave "The Wife" a "Willow Tree" figurine named together, and she presented me with a new set of cuff-links, tie and dress shirt. All in all it's been a great 19 years, I have probably taken more than I have given. "The Wife" is really the one that holds this family together, she knows where the kids have mis-placed a library book, where I have left my car keys or reminds me when I have a dentist appointment.
I Love You Babe, You Are The Best
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
But Officer I Was Only Going One Way
I am traveling up interstate 75 this afternoon talking on my cell phone while messing with my CD player and I look up and "Oh My God" what do I see. Just kidding, but what a great shot. I only wish I was traveling with someone that happened to be sleeping because right about this time I would have laid on the horn and hit the brakes, what a great way to wake someone up.........
Monday, September 05, 2005
Getting Along At Work
I was looking at John's site and saw this "LINK"
I began thinking of some additions to John's list, so here they are:
When ever anybody asks you to go to lunch reply with “Can you give me about 10 minutes to finish this up?” and then shuffle some papers on your desk. This way you appear to be busy.
Subscribe to any industry related periodical and leave them in plain view. You don’t have to actually read them, just leave them on display for others to see.
Print multiple page documents on page at a time. Then make multiple trips to the printer to retrieve your printed document. This makes you look really busy.
Leave a bottle of aspirin on you desk. This will give the appearance that you work is so demanding intense and stressful that it often leads to headaches, possibly migraines.
Have lots of silly toys on your desk. This will lead others to believe that you are at the office so much that you miss your home. This also works well with pictures, even if you don’t have a family that misses you. Most picture frames come with a bogus picture already in it. Look for frames with small children.
Grab some empty soda cans from the recycling bin and scatter them around your desk. You will look so busy you that you don’t even have time to make a trip to the recycling bin.
By
Sunday, September 04, 2005
They Are Coming To Take Me Away
September 02, 2005
The Latest IP Crime: "Box-Wrap" Patent Infringement
Posted by Donna Wentworth
What's that, you ask? Evidently, it's when you ignore the terms written on the side of Lexmark printer cartridge box, refilling the cartridge with ink even when the company has designated it "single use only." According to the Ninth Circuit ruling [PDF] this week in ACRA v. "Lexmark", opening the package means you agree to Lexmark's wishes. And if you break that agreement, you could face claims under contract and patent law.
"Read More"
I wonder if this "Box Wrap" warning is to be viewed in the same way that "Do Not Remove Under Penalty Of Law" mattress tag is?
With ink-jet cartridges being a major contributor to end of year profits it's no wonder they want to protect their sacred cow. I would look for HP to follow suit on this one. From reading the article I would say that Lexmark is really interested in going after business's that re-fill cartridges and not the home user, but it's one more way for them to decide how I care and use for my printer. A better idea would have been to re-write the warranty to state "re manufactured ink cartridges will void said warranty" and who knows that verbage may already be in place.
Read one of my previous posts to see just how consumer/user friendly Lexmark is "LINK"
Saturday, September 03, 2005
He's Very Advanced
This young lad is very advanced for his young age. I did convince him to stay somewhat motionless for a moment or two as I snapped a few pictures.
Even at this young age he is already very health/body conscious. Above he is giving us a quick exhibition of his yoga skills. I think he termed this position "Headus Bowlus Floorus" I termed it "I'm more flexible than you are old man". "Cider-Dog" is thinking "What's Up With This Little Dude"
He then exhibited some of his musical talent as he played a few tunes on our kitchen funnel.
He also showed us how simple everyday items can serve multiple purposes. The pictures above shows how an everyday kitchen bowl can be worn as a hat and then quickly moved over the face to act as face mask for a pickup game of backyard baseball.