Monday, May 28, 2007

Picture Of The Week II

FORT WORTH — Students who had been planning to walk across the stage at graduation ceremonies this weekend were instead walking a picket line Thursday morning. "LINK"

I'm hoping that it was the failing students that made up thee protest signs.

Please someone check "Snopes" to see if this is a hoax

Day Before Memorial Day Party

We made a big ol' pot of "Frogmore Stew". No frogs were hurt during meal creation.

INGREDIENTS
* 6 quarts water
* 3/4 cup Old Bay Seasoning TM
* 2 pounds new red potatoes
* 2 pounds hot smoked sausage links, cut into 2 inch pieces
* 12 ears corn - husked, cleaned and quartered
* 4 pounds large fresh shrimp, unpeeled

DIRECTIONS

1. Bring water and Old Bay Seasoning to boil in a large stockpot.
2. Add potatoes and cook for 15 minutes. Add sausage and cook for 5 minutes more. Add corn and cook for another 5 minutes. Stir in the shrimp and cook until shrimp are pink, about 5 minutes. Drain immediately and serve.

The beverage of choice was "Patriot Sangria". Due to the potency of the Sangria the are no pictures available.

INGREDIENTS:
* 1 Bottle of white wine (Sauvignon Blanc, Chardonnay, Riesling, Airen, Albarino,Gewurztraminer, Viognier)
* 1/2 Cup peach brandy
* 1 cup blueberries
* 1 cup strawberries or raspberries (frozen are fine)
* 1/4 cup strong lemonade (can use orange juice in a pinch)
* 1/4 to 1/2 Cup Sugar (sweeten to taste)

PREPARATION:
Pour wine in a pitcher. Toss in the fruit and add sugar and brandy. Carefully stir until well blended. Chill overnight.

If you'd like to serve right away, use chilled white wine and serve over lots of ice.
"The Wife" took on all challengers that ventured into the horseshoe pit.
And "Goose" managed to find an opportunity to suck up to Mom, as usual.

Saturday, May 26, 2007

Picture Of The Week

Well at least she used the crosswalk.

Sunday, May 20, 2007

He's All Swole Up

We spent Sunday morning with "H" at the local Children's Healthcare facility. The poor lad had an allergic reaction to an antibiotic that he was taking for pink eye and an ear infection. The official medical term "Serum Sickness". "The Wife" believes that if you connected all the hives on him with a marker it would form some kind of a crazy-ass picture.
Other than looking horrendous "H" doesn't seem to be in all that much pain , plus he got to eat all his meals today on the couch.

Looks like he took a shot to the kisser.

Why Math Is Cooler Than English


Do you ever see any English tricks?

1. Grab a calculator (you won't be able to do this one in your head)

2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT THE AREA CODE)

3. Multiply by 80

4. Add 1

5. Multiply by 250

6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number

7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again.

8. Subtract 250

9. Divide number by 2

Do you recognize the answer??

Friday, May 18, 2007

So That's Why It's Called A Happy Meal

OTTAWA, Ill. — An Illinois 8-year-old got more than a hamburger and french fries when she opened her Happy Meal this week.

A 17-year-old employee of an Ottawa, Ill., McDonald's is out of work and facing drug charges after allegedly hiding marijuana and a lighter in the Happy Meal.

Keith Irelan and his three children went through a McDonald's drive-thru Monday night to order Happy Meals. They were on their way to meet their mother at a nearby school for a picnic, police said.

But one of the children — an 8-year-old girl — got a lighter, pipe, and bag of marijuana in her Happy Meal, according to Ottawa Police Chief Brian Zeilmann. Her father went to the police.

"To be honest, you don't expect that," Irelan told FOX Chicago affiliate WFLD-TV.

"She said 'Mom, I have a lighter in my Happy Meal,'" the girl's mother said.

The girl showed the lighter to her dad, then told him later that she got two other "toys" in her Happy Meal. One of those toys was a bag of marijuana. "Read More" "Watch The Video"

A year or so ago I posted about the crappy toys that fast food restaurants manage to unload on our kids with their kids meals "LINK" but the above article might indicate that the restaurants are looking for an older customer to partake in said kids meals.
And the poor McEmployee losses his dope and his job all in the matter of a few hours. Plus he didn't even get interviewed on TV, I guess he's gonna loose his shot at "Hamburger University".

Thursday, May 17, 2007

You Scream I Scream We All Scream

Baskin-Robbins Settles Lawsuit Over Pint Containers

SAN DIEGO -- Baskin-Robbins agreed to pay nearly $500,000 to settle a lawsuit alleging its California franchisees shortchanged customers who bought hand-packed ice cream in pint-sized containers that were underfilled, San Diego's top prosecutor announced Tuesday.

The San Diego Superior Court settlement of the consumer protection lawsuit was announced by District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis, along with the state Attorney General's Office.

"Our office works hard to ensure that consumers receive exactly what is advertised to them,'' Dumanis said. "It's important to hold businesses accountable -- even when it comes to ice cream -- and we will continue to make sure the public gets what it pays for."

The violations were discovered by Weights and Measures officials who performed inspections at 188 locations in 29 counties in California, officials said.

Inspectors purchased 416 containers and found that 343, or 83 percent, of the hand-packed pints were about four ounces short on volume, Dumanis said.

Baskin-Robbins committed similar violations in 1985, and was ordered by the San Diego Superior Court not to advertise hand-packed ice cream as a pint unless the containers were filled to deliver a pint of ice cream by volume, prosecutors said.

As part of the settlement, Baskin-Robbins is required to pay $343,000 in penalties and $148,164 for the cost of the investigation, according to Dumanis.

The settlement contains a court order prohibiting Baskin-Robbins and its franchisees from delivering lesser quantities of its products than what is advertised. "LINK"

One sure fire was to piss off the females members of "Frick's World" is to screw with their ice cream, especially if it's chocolate. Now how did someone with the Weights and Measures division decide to launch this investigation? A couple of theory's, first thought is that the middle aged 300lb type II diabetic needed an excuse for his sugar fix. Second thought is that Mr. Government worker wanted some Rocky Road from his local Baskin Robbin only to find out that they were out and this is his own private vendetta.
You know it's called hand-packed for a reason. People have different sized hands, my hands are so tiny that I can barely hold onto a "Big Gulp". If I'm scooping the ice cream you're going to get short changed.
I wonder who had the utter brilliance to approve this investigation and then how did you manage to spend $148,000 dollars on it, that's over $350.00 per hand-packed container.
And what the hell handed to these 417 containers of evidence? Did the Weights and Measures employees eat it? Are they now going to sue themselves for getting fat from eating all the ice cream? Questions Questions Questions, and it's all about ice cream.

View From Here

Easley, SC
Hampton Inn #330
Razor V3 Camera Phone

View From Here

Matthews, NC
Hampton Inn #502
Razor V3 Camera Phone

Monday, May 14, 2007

Not The First To Blog About This

As much travel as I do I see some crazy crazy stuff, mailboxes made car rims, tombstones in the front yard and monkeys with hand trowels (you had to be there). Some of this stuff is so wild that if I posted it you'd think it was photoshopped.
Driving through Monroe, OH we (all of us) saw the above image and we (all of us) were so stunned that no one (none of us) could react quick enough to grab the camera. It's legit here's the "LINK".
And what's better is that Haywood Banks saw the same sight and decided to pen the song "Big Butter Jesus"

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Of Graduations, Proms And Such.......


It was a weekend of endings and beginnings. Niece "A" ended her her 4 year "Wittenberg" odyssey and will now set forth in her pursuit to make a dent in the universe.
Graduation was held in the hollow.
hol-low noun - Indian word that describes grassy slightly raised meadow area that contains metal fold-up chairs, lots of sun and minimal breeze.......
"H" managed to blend in while on campus
The three sisters?This is Niece "B", she is ending her High School academia undertaking (the best 6 years of my life) and that means prom time. Speaking of proms I even learned a new term, "Prom Baby" you're never to old to learn. Almost forgot this is Bri-Man, Niece "B"'s date, he even opened the car door for her, it's the little things that make a difference.

No, not a scene from Riverdance, just a new trend in prom pictures
Gentlemen, you look puzzled, what's up? Where's the ladies? More than likely they're all huddled in the bathroom and guess what THEY'RE talking about you.
Could it be that you're wondering if you have enough cash for the evening? I've been married over 20 years and you will never have enough cash.
As you embark on the pursuit of the female species you will find yourself often assuming the above pictured position, don't fret, just don't take your hand off your chin and place it on top of your head, don't ask me how I know this.

What Happens To People When They Get Old

"Sometimes your hair gets white" or it turns clear.
Here are the thoughts of our little angels, the same angels that are supposed to take care of US when we get old. "Click Here To See The Whole Flickr Set"
via "BoingBoing"

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Fortunately


Growing up on of my favorite childhood books was "Fortunately" by Remi Charlip. I remember reading that book over and over again.
Here's a clip from the book:

Fortunately, Ned was invited to a surprise party.

Unfortunately, the party was a thousand miles away.

Fortunately, a friend loaned Ned an airplane.

Unfortunately, the motor exploded.

Fortunately, there was a parachute in the airplane.

Unfortunately, there was a hole in the parachute.

You get the idea good news, bad news in the end it was a happy tidy little story.
Now I told you that story to tell you this story.

British Man Expecting to Live a Year Spends All and Finds Out He's Not Dying
By Nannette Richford Published May 07, 2007

John Brandick a 62 year old British man may have learned the meaning of "Live Like You are Dying"; unfortunately, he's now faced with living with nothing but the shirt on his back and the black suit and red tie he planned to be buried in.It turns out, that when he was told two years ago that he had pancreatic cancer and was would likely die within a year, it was all a big mistake. But he didn't know that then. Brandick, thinking he only had only a year to live decided to get the most out of what life he had left. He quit his job. Then he quit paying on his mortgage. He embarked on a spending spree that ultimately depleted his finances. He used
his savings to go on vacations, go out to eat, and do all the little things that made life enjoyable. What he didn't give away to friends and family, he sold to raise a little more spending money to make his last days enjoyable. After all, he wasn't going to need any of it any more.
A year later, when Brandick returned for a medical appointment, he suddenly discovered that his cancer was merely an inflammation of the pancreas and not a tumor at all. Instead of facing death, Brandick was now facing life. It came as quite a shock to Brandick. He was suddenly given a new lease on life, but then he remembered that he had no money left to live on. When he spent his money on vacations and fine dining simply for the joy of it, he had no idea there would ever come a time when he would need it. "When they tell you you've got a limited time and everything, you do enjoy life," he told Sky TV. "I'm really pleased that I've got a second chance in life... but if you haven't got no money after all this, which is my fault -- I spent it all -- they should pay something back." he adds. Although Brandick thinks the hospital should give him compensation for this misdiagnosis; the hospital claims that after a review of his case, that the diagnosis would have been the same from any other facility. They do, however; offer their sympathies. Brandick is considering selling his house if he does not receive compensation. He is also considering suing the hospital that diagnosed him. "LINK"

Poor John, reminds me a little of Ned, except John's story would be titled Unfortunately. This guy did what Tim McGraw sang about in "Live Like You Were Dying" except poor John ain't dying all that quickly now. But alas John did manage to pull off a fairly decent plan, screw it I ain't paying my mortgage or my car note, matter of fact I might buy a boat, no make it a yacht. John fortunately your gonna live, unfortunately you ain't got no mo' stuff.......

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Goodbye "CB"


Well we've had to say goodbye to "CB" this week at the office. While that might bring sadness to some to others, like myself, that means one thing and one thing only. Time to rummage through his office and see if he left anything worth having behind. Notice I didn't say valuable because we all get our office supplies from the same place, besides who needs another pack of Post-It notes or another Sharpie. We're hunting for personal stuff, stuff he brought in from home, maybe stuff he's to embarrassed to take back home. Maybe and old "Night Ranger" cd or a "Gung Ho" dvd.
Well I found what I was looking for and it's now hanging up in my office. It's my new motto, better yet a credo:

There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.
Coach Bobby Finstock 1985

Yeah, that's how I roll.
Take Luck "CB"

Sunday, May 06, 2007

No Thanks I'm Not Hungry

"AD" took this picture just to keep us abreast of the latest North Carolina food trends.
"Spotted Dick" what am I still 12 years old?

Delta


Dear Delta

Congratulations on coming out of bankruptcy . By the way Citgo called and thay want their logo back.

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Dr Crackerjaw


Police: Unlicensed Dentist Used Box Cutters

POSTED: 8:14 am EDT May 2, 2007 UPDATED: 5:41 pm EDT May 2, 2007

CARROLLTON, Ga. -- Authorities have arrested an illegal immigrant on charges that he ran an unlicensed dental practice out of his home in Carrollton. Ernesto Estrado is accused of performing procedures on hundreds of illegal immigrants who were too afraid to go to a licensed dentist. Authorities say the man used pliers, box cutters and etching blades he bought at a hardware store to pull teeth, fill cavities and create dentures. Authorities searched his home and found prescription painkillers, hypodermic needles and a ledger that detailed cash payments from more than 100 people. Estrada is being held without bond in the Carroll County Jail. Channel 2 will have a live update on Channel 2 Action News at 6.
"LINK"

I think I might have come close to "Richmanwisco" with this one. No matter how much pain I was in I don't think I'd let anyone in my mouth with a box cutter. Besides Ernesto could have easily made more money bilking the government and the insurance companies than taking cash from a few immigrants.
And what does this have to say about all the dentists that actually spent the time & money to go through dental school, opened an office and took out a Yellow Book add, when all Ernesto had to do was move his sofa aside and put a higher wattage bulb in the chandelier.

This Is Why I Didn't Become A Lawyer

plus the fact I didn't have the grades, cash or wardrobe.

Lawyer's Price For Missing Pants: $65 Million

By Marc Fisher Thursday, April 26, 2007; Page B01

When the neighborhood dry cleaner misplaced Roy Pearson's pants, he took action.
He complained. He demanded compensation. And then he sued. Man, did he sue.
Two years, thousands of pages of legal documents and many hundreds of hours of
investigative work later, Pearson is seeking to make Custom Cleaners pay -- would
you believe more than the payroll of the entire Washington Nationals roster?
"LINK"

Take the time to read the link it's pure comedy gold. Of course you guessed it our plaintiff is a lawyer. Granted Mr Pearson's wearing some nice "Hickey Freeman" suits not your off the rack "Garanimal" variety that I wear.
Now to enlighten Mr Pearson here are some basic life rules, guidelines tips etc....... that I tend to follow:
Never rely on picking up anything at the dry cleaner the morning you plan to wear it. It will never work out, Mr Young has been doing my clothes for years and yes he has made a few mistakes but nothing worth suing him over.

When you take 4 day trip pack for 5 days, some things going happen at some point and you don't know where that point is at so be prepared.

Never use a fast food drive in cause you're going to get screwed. It's nothing against you it's just the way fast food restaurants operate. Just think how much money you would save every year by forgetting to put straws in a few dozen orders each day. When you go inside for your food you're in control of the straws napkins etc.....

Only buy genuine Q-tips and Pop Tarts because all of the generic versions suck.