Monday, September 29, 2008

Word Of The Day






BLACKBERRY JAM - A people traffic jam that occurrs in subway tunnels and bus stations. Caused by inconsiderate workaholics walking too slow while their noses are glued to their Blackberry device.

I was late for work because there was a Blackberry Jam getting out of the A train.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Oh Lawd!

A Shelby County man and his wife said two doctors amputated the man's penis without his consent, and have filed a lawsuit.

According to the lawsuit, Philip Seaton, 61, went to have a circumcision last Octoberas part of treatment for a medical condition. Seaton said when he woke up from the procedure, he realized his penis had been amputated.

Seaton has suffered mental anguish, pain, and has lost the enjoyment of life, according to the lawsuit.
The lawsuit was filed in Shelby County court last week against Dr. John Patterson, who performed the procedure, Dr. Oliver James, who administered anesthesia, and Commonwealth Urology, PSC.
"Read The Rest"

"Doctor I can't feel my penis" - "That's cause we amputated your hands"

What do you call the person that graduated last in their medical class? "Doctor"

Dear God how much money could possibly ease this mans pain? I have no idea but I can "George Zimmer" guarantee that it's going to contain a whole bunch of zeros.

Now I'm sure that Dr. Ginsu Knife did what he felt was in the best interest of his patient and since Dr. Ginsu Knife is also a male I'm sure this was not a snap decision, but general male to male courtesy does require full and complete consciousness by both parties before any penis cutting begins.

View From Here

St. Petersburg, FL
Hilton #420

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Curious George Part Tres'


George Michael Arrested Over Drugs

George Michael was arrested in public toilets suspected of possessing drugs.

Reports say the multi-millionaire singer was arrested after a tip-off from a suspicious toilet attendant after he was seen loitering in underground loos in London's Hampstead Heath on Friday.

When officers arrived Michael was still in the toilet and police reportedly found him in possession of cannabis and crack cocaine.

In a candid interview for BBC Radio 4's Desert Island Discs last year, Michael talked openly about his drug use.

He said: "I'm a happy man and I can afford my marijuana so that's not a problem."

A spokesman for the Met Police said: "I can confirm that a 45-year-old man was arrested on September 19 on suspicion of possession of drugs in the Hampstead Heath area.

"He was taken to a north London police station where he received a caution for possession of class A and class C drugs."

At his last concert at Earls Court in London last month he announced to journalists that there would be no more stadium tours.

Michael's tour began in Barcelona in September 2006 and he has entertained more than 1.3 million fans across Europe and North America.

The 21-date American leg of the tour was the first time he has performed there for 17 years and included New York, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Chicago and Washington.

LINK

What inspires famous folks to get a pocketful of drugs and head out and into public? Most "Hollywood" types, except for Gary Coleman, MC Hammer, & Ed McMahon manage to somehow manage to live in a more than adequate crib. Why not just stay in their crib and waste away on their steady diet of drugs and take-out food.

George hasn't had a new album in the last several years but still manages to keep his face in front of us, unfortunately it's usually in the form of a mugshot.



Travel Tip #26

If you have a safe in your hotel room, don't always trust it!
'The rest of the tips"

A few time a year I get lucky enough to stay in what you would call one of the "Better" hotels. They're usually are stocked with a better grade of toiletries, real glasses, a cordless phone and if it's a really nice hotel you get an in room safe.
Now I don't have anything that I would deem worthy of locking in a safe, but being a nerd I'm intrigued with anything that has a keypad and an LED display. Meaning it requires further investigation.

Last week I checked into one of these "Better" hotels (how can they come up with a $700.00 per night rack rate) and there's my safe. Except instead of being bolted to the floor in the closet this one's stuck in the TV hutch.

After about .5 of a second I had said safe out of the hutch on the bed and ready to throw in my suitcase and head out the door. The bottom side of the safe looked like it could be torn open with a screwdriver or a cinder block which ever would be the handiest.
Note to the hotel staff - use something stronger than double sided tape to make sure your safe is safe.

Yummmmmm!

Get one at your local "Baskin-Robbins"

This could quite possibly be one of the most complete foods you could ever consume. Get almost half a weeks allotment of saturated fat in one frosty beverage. Be done with your carb loading before lunch and with 266 grams of sugar you should be awake for hours and on top of it all you still manage to get 35 grams of protein.
Would you rather drink one of these or eat a bland grilled chicken breast? Yeah me too.

Nutrition Facts
Serving Size 1 Serving (32 fl.oz)
Amount Per Serving
Calories 2310 Calories from Fat 970
% Daily Value*
Total Fat 108g 166%
Saturated Fat 64g 320%
Trans Fat 2.5g
Cholesterol 295mg 98%
Sodium 1560mg 65%
Total Carbohydrates 303g 101%
Dietary Fiber 2g 8%
Sugar 266g
Protein 35g
Vitamin A 60%
Vitamin C 15%
Calcium 120%
Iron 6%
































Saturday, September 20, 2008

Is It Fall?

The cats think it is. The windows are open & the air conditioning is off, lets hope it stays that way.

View From Here


Dallas, TX
Gaylord Texan #9140

Monday, September 08, 2008

I Are Smart

Man I must be bored

Your result for The Commonly Confused Words Test...

Advanced

You scored 93% Beginner, 86% Intermediate, 87% Advanced, and 73% Expert!


You have an extremely good understanding of beginner, intermediate, and advanced level commonly confused English words, getting at least 75% of each of these three levels' questions correct. This is an exceptional score. Remember, these are commonly confused English words, which means most people don't use them properly. You got an extremely respectable score.


Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!


Take The Commonly Confused Words Test at HelloQuizzy

The Odds Are

song chart memes
more music charts

Ain't that the truth!!!

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Snakes On A Plane, Not

JetBlue flight diverted after fight breaks out

(CNN) -- A JetBlue flight from Boston, Massachusetts, to Fort Lauderdale, Florida, was diverted Saturday when a fight broke out after someone was smoking in the bathroom, federal officials said.

One passenger aboard JetBlue Flight 455 was taken into custody at Raleigh-Durham International Airport in North Carolina after the plane landed about 5:45 p.m.

A federal Transportation Security Administration spokeswoman said one person was injured in the face by what may have been a punch. She said the fight involved three people who are thought to be related.

According to the airline, there were 88 people and four crew members aboard the jet. The flight had been scheduled to leave Boston at 1 p.m. but did not take off until 3:11 p.m., spokeswoman Alison Eshelman said.

Eyewitnesses said the scuffle was between two brothers, one of whom was angry that his brother had smoked on a plane.

One passenger interviewed by CNN affiliate WFOR said the fight left one of the men bloody.

"I saw the guy holding his head with the blood coming out," Mike Rocha said.

The jet was held at the North Carolina airport for about two hours while FBI investigators interviewed passengers. "LINK"

Lets see if we can figure this one out, you've got a plane, that for whatever reason is over 2 hours late taking off and I would imagine that the flight attendants started rolling the beverage cart up and down the isle. It wouldn't surprise me if the fabulous Baker Boys partook in some adult beverages. Then as we all know with drinking at some point you gotta go to the bathroom and what better time for a smoke then while you are in the bathroom. A jolly good time till your brother starts banging his fists off of your melon.
I bet Mom is proud of her little darlings.

I wonder if they still allowed smoking on planes if this would've happened?

It's Game Time

Goose's school had their home opener Friday night, they lost. One of the schools written in stone traditions is that only seniors are allowed to wear camo pants on game day (Friday). Goose has waited 3 long years to sport the camo look and it's finally time. With the camo you also get the fashion trend of black tank tops and maroon & gold body paint, oh yippee.

Our driveway looked like an HGTV show.








Finally it was game time, BOW DOWN to the seniors y'all.

View From Here

Miami, FL
Hyatt Place #502

One hotel for 3 nights and out before the hurricanes arrive.

"Hotel's that I've stayed at"

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Travel Tip #25

This tip is actually useful, so you know I didn't think of it. It came from "Make Use Of"

You can check your flight status using Google just enter the airlines name, space, and your flight number "Delta 861"

Check out the other tips "LINK"

Monday, September 01, 2008

Cardio Monday

I'm going to do some stair work today. When does a staircase become a ladder?
Check it out "LINK"