Friday, August 31, 2007

View From Here

Savannah, GA
Hampton Inn #200
"Google Map"

Sunday, August 26, 2007

The Future Of America

I'm glad she is cute.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

An Excellant Source Of Protein

I'm at the grocery store this morning and I came across "Healthy Hemp" bread.
5g Fiber, 7g Protein and Omega 3-6-9's in every slice. I did see a couple of the local High School students trying to light a slice.

Another Friday Night And I’m A Dumb Ass

I left Ft Lauderdale last night at 5:00pm with an expected arrival in Atlanta at 7:00pm. Pretty easy and sound plan, yeah right.
This is your Captain speaking we are in a holding pattern as there is a storm sitting over the Atlanta airport, we’ll keep you apprised of any changes.
This is your Captain speaking Ah yeah we’re still in a holding pattern if this continues much longer we are going to have to divert to Columbia, SC to take on additional fuel.
This is your Captain speaking we are heading to Columbia, SC for refueling.
We land in Columbia, SC for refueling.
The moment we land the entire interior of the plane lights up with the glow of cell phones. The typical conversation We’re in @*!#$ Columbia, SC. Yeah, weather in Atlanta Yeah I’m going to miss my connection.
I’m lucky I live in Atlanta no chance of me missing a connection.
They toss us some token water and crackers. This is where several people exited the plane and headed to Hertz and a 3:00 hour drive back to Atlanta. I should have followed the smart people and exited the plane, but alas
I’m a dumb ass.
We are fueled up, the paper work is signed and we head for the runway.
The engines shut off, not a good sign.
This is your Captain speaking Ah yeah the Atlanta airport has invoked flow control and we are going to be sitting here for a while.
I’m still a dumb ass
This is your Captain speaking, Ah yeah we have a wheels up time of 9:50. My dumb ass points are increasing by the minute, no make that the second.
I'm a dumb ass.
The surfer dude sitting next to me asks the Flight Attendant if she could put a movie in while we are waiting, good thinking. What does she put in but "Jam & Jerusalem" , you ever heard of it? Me neither. Yeah the Flight Attendant pulled a good one over on us, what a brutally painful show.
I’m such a dumb ass and so is surfer dude.
The standard "any devices with an off/on switch needs to be turned off so we can be ready for take off".
Again, the standard "any devices with an off/on switch needs to be turned off so we can be ready for take off".
Across the isle from me Ricky Bobby begins holding his powered off cell phone above his head. This continues for several minutes. I call him Ricky Bobby because he’s wearing his black #8 baseball hat and matching black #8 shirt. Go "Little E".
More on Ricky latter
We are airborne but
I’m still a dumb ass.
We land in Atlanta.
The second, and I mean the second we land Ricky Bobby stands up and starts heading up the isle. He makes it about 7 rows and turns around and head for the back of the plane turns around again and goes back to his seat. Surfer dude turns to me and says What the $%@#.
This is your Captain speaking, Ah yeah there are 180 planes on the ground and only 110 gates we’re going to be sitting here for a while. If I had exited the plane in Columbia, SC I would be home in my bed by now.
I’m such a dumb ass.
Ricky Bobby is standing in the doorway of the plane writing down the Flight Attendants names, Ricky Bobby, is a dumb ass.
Maybe he was going to report them for making us watch Jam & Jerusalem, I sure hope so.
I’m finally home.

A Few Good Men

That's why I say "Always get a receipt".

View From Here

Miami Fl
Hampton Inn #600
"Google Map"

View From Here

Richmond, VA
Holiday Inn #443
"Google Maps"

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Hot Hot Hot & Dry

The heat coupled with the absolute lack of rain is producing "crispy" landscaping around here.

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Beer Review

Generally when I partake in the hops it's usually of the dark and full bodied variety. Well the marketing guys at "Miller Chill" hit me right between the eyes with the slick green bottle and snazzy label. At 110 calories and 6.5g of carbs per bottle you have the freedom to polish off the whole six pack without getting that bloated feeling. Oh yeah it's a light beer, but I'd buy it again.

View From Here

Oxford, AL
Hampton Inn #402
"Google Maps"

Monday, August 13, 2007

And The Stupidity Continues

Woman calls police about 'fake' cocaine
Mon Aug 13, 4:32 PM ET

ROCHELLE, Ga. - A woman was arrested after she called police to help "get her money back" after she was unhappy with the crack cocaine she purchased.

Juanita Marie Jones, 53, called Rochelle Police late Thursday night after she purchased what she thought was a $20 piece of crack cocaine, according to police reports.

She told officers she broke the rock into three pieces and smoked one, only to discover the drugs were "fake."

She took Officer Joel Quinn and Deputy John Shedd of the Wilcox County Sheriff's Office into her kitchen and showed them the drugs, police said.

She was promptly arrested on charges of possession of cocaine. "LINK" "VIA"

What in the hell are you doing at the age of 53 buying crack? And then to top it off you buy fake crack and then if that's not enough you call the cops to help you get your crack cash back.

I'm not a big drug type of guy maybe an Aleve every so often for a hangover but that's the extent of it. I'm not a real smart guy either but I would be a smart enough "Crackhead" to figure out that if I'm calling the cops over some bogus crack I'm running a pretty good chance of ending up in jail.
Hasn't Juanita Marie Jones ever watched an episode of "COPS"?

Sunday, August 12, 2007

You Can't Always Get What You Want

Man says hold the cheese, claims McDonald's didn't, sues for $10 million
by Justin D. Anderson
Daily Mail Staff

A Morgantown man, his mother and his friend are suing McDonald's for $10 million.

The man says he bit into a hamburger and had a severe allergic reaction to the cheese melted on it.

Jeromy Jackson, who is in his early 20s, says he clearly ordered two Quarter Pounders without cheese at the McDonald's restaurant in Star City before heading to Clarksburg.

His mother Trela Jackson and friend Andrew Ellifritz are parties to the lawsuit because they say they risked their lives rushing Jeromy to United Hospital Center in Clarksburg.

The lawsuit alleges Jeromy "was only moments from death" or serious injury by the time he reached the hospital.

"We're interested in seeing McDonald's take responsibility and change a systemic quality control problem that endangers the lives of up to 12 million Americans with allergies," said Timothy Houston, the Morgantown lawyer representing the plaintiffs.

Houston said his clients were in Morgantown in October 2005 and stopped at the Star City McDonald's on the way home to Clarksburg. Jeromy Jackson was living with his mother at the time.

Jeromy did his part to make it known he didn't want cheese on the hamburgers because he is allergic, Houston said.

He told a worker through the ordering speaker and then two workers face-to-face at the pay and pick-up windows that he couldn't eat cheese, Houston said. "Read More"

Poor Mr. Jackson it must suck having deadly food allergies, but has he never been to a McDonald's? The McDonald's folks have a hard time getting straws & napkins into your bag as they try to whisk you through the drive through in under 90 seconds.
Making a request that requires "Sir Make-A-Burger" to be able to read "No Cheese" and then to follow through with that, well that's where you found yourself Mr. Jackson.
Mr. Jackson I'm not sure if this will make it trial and I'm not sure if you'll get $10,000,000.00 (that's a bunch of zeros) but I will give you some free advice. Next time you go through a drive-thru and even if you don't make a special request open the damn bag before you blindly start stuffing your face, it might just same your life.

View From Here

Lexington, South Carolina
Hampton Inn #402
"Google Map"

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Walk Score

For those that travel it's real easy to get real fat real quick on the road. So to combat that you try to exercise but there's only so much "Fox News" you can watch while you are on a treadmill. Enter "Walk Score" input your hotels address and "Walk Score" gives you all the local attractions and the approximate distance to each. Hey if you gotta walk you might as well be walking towards the local BBQ joint or micro-brewery.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Copier Frustration?

The ultimate revenge? It's only a copier how pissed off can it make you?

@#!?% It's Hot

Columbia, South Carolina

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Nothing Good Comes From Alcohol

Woman runs over driving instructor

By ASSOCIATED PRESS Published August 6, 2007

NAPLES - A man giving a 30-year-old woman a driving lesson had to be airlifted to a hospital after the woman accidentally ran over him, the Collier County Sheriff's Office said.

David Tanner, 51, was teaching Victoria Hosner how to drive Thursday night when she accidentally hit the gas pedal and accelerated backward, according to the Sheriff's Office.

Tanner was standing near the vehicle and was knocked to the ground. Victoria Hosner then ran over Tanner's leg.

"It was totally an accident," Victoria Hosner's husband, David Hosner, said.

Victoria Hosner continued to drive in reverse and caused about $6,000 worth of damage, authorities estimated.

Tanner was airlifted to Lee Memorial Hospital in Fort Myers. He was discharged by Sunday, according to hospital records.

A deputy thought Hosner's eyes were bloodshot and her breath smelled of alcohol, according to the Sheriff's Office. A test measured her blood-alcohol level at .146, above .08, at which the state presumes a driver impaired.

Hosner faces charges of driving under the influence, three counts of driving under the influence with damage to property or to a person and driving without a license.

She was released on $4,250 bail Friday, according to jail records.

[Last modified August 6, 2007, 00:28:27] "LINK"

What did this lady think she was a "flight attendant"? Looks like a big week for drunks. How come the driving instructor didn't pick up on the bloodshot eyes or ListerBeam breath? And how fast do you have to be going in reverse do pull off $6000.00 in damages? Maybe she crashed into a $5000.00 statue, who knows..................
I would imagine if you were a driving instructor your biggest fear would be being involved in an accident while inside the car, this poor cat probably never imagined being injured while being on the outside of the car.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Back To School Time

I'd be willing to go back to school just so I carry one of these lunch boxes. "LINK"

Picture/Story Of The Week

DUI Suspect Arrested Wearing "I'm A Drunk" Shirt
POSTED: 8:07 am EDT August 3, 2007
UPDATED: 1:23 pm EDT August 3, 2007

A Florida woman arrested on charges of drunken driving for a second time since April was taken into custody wearing a T-shirt that read, "I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a drunk -- Alcoholics go to meetings."The T-shirt with the drinking message was visible in Amanda Lynn Bailey's mug shot Wednesday.Bailey, 41, was charged with driving under the influence and driving with a canceled, suspended or revoked license. She posted $750 bond and was released.Police did not capture any T-shirt messages during her April arrest for drunken driving, the report said. "LINK"

Un-freaking-believable there's not much of a chance of talking yourself out a D.U.I while you're wearing that shirt. Two D.U.I arrests in the last 6 months this chick needs to move to Hollywood and hang out with Lindsay or Nicole. And what's with a $750.00 bail, can you say habitual?
Maybe she can show up for court wearing a "The court finds probable cause..... to have another martini" shirt. "LINK"

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Not The Ideal Way To Gain Weight

Pregnancy has been known to cause weight gain, but somehow I don't think this is what her doctor had in mind. "LINK"
If she does end up in jail for a few days at least she she'll be getting 3 square meals a day during her stay.

She's Single

All right boys the divorce is final and from the looks of it "Miss Thing" is just busting out to see you.
As I recall right before Britney melted down the last time she died her hair dark and started wearing really trashy (not that there's anything wrong with it) clothes. Could this be a sign of what's in store for our young divorced Britney? Only time and "TMZ" will tell.