Friday, November 25, 2005

Ah, Grasshopper

After consuming mass quantities of food last evening and before we launched into a all hands on deck 4 alarm kitchen clean up I decided to provide some after dinner entertainment.
This trick was taught to me overseas by the Zen master "Banzan Corkus Removeus". This was the same Zen master that explained and then demonstrated the "One handed man clapping" mystery for me.
First find an empty bottle of wine and cork. Somehow manage to get the cork back into the empty bottle.
Now in your best Zen Master voice ask everybody in the room if they think you can remove the cork from the bottle without breaking it. Next in your best Zen Master voice ask how much they are willing to pay in order to see you perform this Zen Master trick. This trick is worth at least $5.00.
Once you have a commitment as to a financial benefit you will receive grab a cloth napkin from the table. Oh, did I fail to mention that you will need a cloth napkin? Sorry, if you don't have a cloth napkin you are basically screwed. Roll the napkin into a tube and feed it down the throat of the bottle. Once it is down the throat of the bottle the tube will expand. Tilt the bottle upside down so that the cork falls into the center of the napkin tube.

Slowly work the cork napkin combination right up to the throat of the bottle. Next give the napkin a quick and powerful jerk and the cork will come flying right out.
Now grab your cash.

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